Saturday, October 26, 2013

                                  Social Grievances  Redressal Day of the God.
The Almighty decided to listen to the complaints of  all human beings  so as to reduce the number of long pending files in the Heaven.He fixed a day for a selected list of people and appeared in the dreams of those people and directed  them to present their cases in writing and directed them to deposit them in a box  which they will see at the main junction of the local town/village.He promised to give a solution by  next day evening during their dreams.
         All the dreamers  started preparing their complaints .Since many of them had demands which could not be told/given in writing ,a few with some qualms withdrew from putting n in the complaints.Only some genuine devotes and a few cutthroats decided to take the risk of  verbal presentation. The crux of a few  complaints  read like the following.
 I am a very lazy fellow,but want to be the richest fellow in my area.
Though I don’t have proper education or job I want to marry a rich/beautiful /educated  girl.
I have killed a neighbor friend during  a joint trip for a business venture and stole a large sum from his bag. Please save me from punishment
My enemy is running a good company.I want it to disintegrate at the earlist and come to my hands so that I can prosper.
Please place a small idol of You in my home’s yard and bless me so that I can build a small temple there and make much money by placing a huge Hundial there.
I want to be a consultant for admissions to professional colleges  throughout India/abroad.I can mint crores through that.Please guide me for that.
I want to be a busy doctor /surgeon who can earn crores  from my miserable/helpless patients.I can even sell their organs  during sedation and help the lives of other patients also.
Please give me a magical pot that will bring prosperity to the custodian as long as it remains with me.If it is dug in any body else’s premises that person should lose his assets and the same should come to me.
I want to be a Godman who will be believed and respected by even VVIPs.I will then build a beautiful  Aasram in a vast compound and live there with all modern luxury items/rolls royces etc.
Please help me to buy a small plot in my village  and build a small house for my  family .
I want to encroach 1000 acresof forest land .Please locate an ideal area in my dream and help me to acquire that.
I make money by smuggling gold ,drugs,weapons etc  on an international level.Please keep my trusted agents out of theattention of the airport authorities.
I am in the patriotic service of printing/circulating Indian currencies of all denominations.I want it to continue unhindered.I want to amass properties  in all the vital locations through that.I will give 10 5 of my profits to you or for orphanages/destitute.I can get a few trustworthy agents also by such philanthropic  gestures.
My son is suffering from epilepsy for long.Please cure him up .I will offer anything for that.
Please give me a bottle full of best quality liquor.You should help me by filling the empty bottle with any type of liquor that I desire on all occasions.It is really boring to spend hours in queue in front of the beverages  outlets.
I want to  produce /direct/have the leading role in,a hit Malayalam film.A song from my own pen and voice should get the national award also. I shall tie a magical wand before I start the project.
I pray that my children should be rewarded for all the good actions from me.I alone should be punished for any wrong doings by me.
I make money by all fair/fowl means.I never spare any field in that.Hundreds of poor people are working as my agents for whom I am  the visible God.If any of my men  deceive me,he will not see the next morning.I give lavishly to any body who is SINCERE and HONEST in his work.
I am running a star firm in the city with dozens of beautiful /educated girls fluent in several languages and also customs.There are many who come there with lakhs for utilizing the stuffs in my PARADISE.At times I use the services of my trusted/trained  agents to  bring forcibly or by deceit rich/popular personalities ( both men and women ) for getting their NICE snaps with  OTHERS of my choice.Then I use these snaps for  extorting  huge cash from them through blackmailing.Please bless me and for the smooth running of the SHOW.
I am a performer of spiritual rites for the believers.Though I don’t have much knowledge of the conduct  of these poojas I am considered by the public to be a Godman who can do miracles for my devotees through my interventions .I do this by keeping a few  commission agents in several locations whose remuneration is commensurate with the ORDERS they canvas and execute.I do believe in the theory “you can surely  fool every body once,but can’t fool  all for all times.”As the takers of such prescriptions are so large that I am not able to fool even a tiny fraction of them. As you are the cause of my prosperity plese don’t desert /trap me.
I am a plywood dealer.I procure the materials from the neighbouring units and dispatch them to the consumers in other states,through trucks .When these trucks return I get equipments for me and also for my known clients in Kerala.Both during the onward and return trips we smuggle illicit materials ( I don’t want to mention the names of such items for fear ).As I keep the inspectors at the checkposts in good humour by my lavishness at the right place and right time ,they never cause any headache to me.Oh my God Every year I make my pilgrimage to all the main holy places of all religious groups ,as I believe in the ONENESS of God.During festivals ,marriages,deaths etc in the neighbourhood I donate liberally and insist on my being invited to such functions and speak to the audience about the greatness of God.As your brand ambassador it is your duty to  provide a hastlefree atmosphere for my business.
I believe that demanding interest for loans is a sin .So I persuade others to give me loans without interest.I use such funds for  trading business where I make 100 % or 200 % profit.As profit making is not a sin,I have become a millionaire within a short span of time .Payment of interest and selling of goods at reasonable profits would never have brought me up to the present enviable position.As you have advised I make liberal donations to the poor and the places of worships of all communities.Hope I don’t have to earn your wrath in any of my actions.
 God postponed the reading of the remaining requests/complaints to another session.

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